What to do if you get a speeding ticket. (no guarantees that you will receive a letter in mail regarding this, says so on your ticket)

In this article I will do several things:

1. Bitch about getting a ticket
2. Bitch about waiting for info about what to do with my ticket
3. Bitch about how crappy that info is
4. Try to explain how poorly laid out this info is
5. Tell you what they really mean
6. give you the phone number of people who DON’T SUCK and that will actually help you.

1- First let me start off by stating that I am not protesting my ticket. I was in fact going 56mph in a 40mph zone. What does particularly bother me though, is that police choose to work certain areas as their projects instead of really going after people who are putting peoples lives in danger. 6 motorcycle cops were all sitting at the end of this bridge with their radar guns out, pulling over EVERY car going over 40. That means, ME, the car next to me, and the cars in front of and behind me. So here is a $350 ticket I receive for going the same speed as the rest of traffic. When you’re not scanning continually for speed limit signs in an area you drive through 4 times a day, 5 days a week, you kind of just go what speed you feel to be safe. The road before the street feels like a 40mph zone. But as soon as you pull onto the bridge the road becomes drastically wider and feels like you’ve just entered a freeway. Everyone starts going closer to 60mph just because of how the road feels. I assure you I go 40mph until I hit that thing. Traffic cops piss people off, nannying traffic is what they are there for, whatever.

2- All of that BS aside, the thing that really pisses me off is the way the Superior Court of California, County of Stanislaus operates. My court date for my ticket is 2 months from when I get the ticket. They mail me the information about the court date 2 weeks before I need to go in. You would think they could manage to get that to you faster. Still, not that big of a problem. But on this single piece of paper, VERY vague directions inform you about traffic school. First, traffic school costs should be FREE or DEDUCTED from the current cost of your ticket. If you’re willing to take the time to learn to be a “better driver” they should reward you for that not charge you an additional $56 f#$%ing dollars. But alas, everyone is out to rape you, so whatever. Instructions for Traffic School on this crappy little piece of paper are as follows.

3- On this crappy piece of paper it finally informs me that my ticket is for the amount of $341. It tells me that I need to appear 05/04/2010 @ 8:00am at my local traffic court. It gives me a Case #, Citation #, and other basic info. On the back it talks about Traffic School.

4- This is what these pathetic losers have to say:

You may choose to attend Traffic Violator’s School (TVS) for certain moving violations. You are eligible if you are not currntly attending traffic school and have not attended traffic school for a citation issued in the last 18 months. In addition to the bail amount indicated on the front, a $56 non-refundable fee is due when requesting traffic school.

(now here is the interesting bits) You must request traffic school before your court date.(<–really?) To request traffic school enclose a legal size envelope with 90 cents postage.(I’m giving you $56 and you want me to give you a f#%$ing envelope plus postage? You’re that damned cheap?) Your case will be dismissed when all fees are paid and certificate of completion has been filed with the court by your due date. (so due date… is that a new due date that nobody has given me yet? or are you wanting me to both apply for traffic court by mailing you, receive my 90 cents worth of paperwork, then apply for traffic school, complete it, and then mail you a voucher by the day of my court date. All of this after you’re only giving me 2 weeks notice of my actual court date! Something is very unclear here.) DO NOT PAY YOUR TICKET ONLINE (why not? Is this an option somewhere? You don’t mention it at all other than this, what are you hiding from us?)

If you are not eligible, full bail will be applied and case closed. Pursuant to VC section 42005(C), a holder of a commercial driver’s license is not eligible for traffic violator’s school.

Okay… So if you have a commercial license you don’t qualify. Why do you guys keep changing the name between Traffic school and TVS? Just stick to one already. So I’m not sure if you readers have noticed this yet, but the information is vague and stupid. Let’s try calling the court.

“Oh, all lines are busy. Let’s wait on hold for 20 minutes. Nope, no success. Let’s call again later in the day. Hmm, better give it another 20 minutes of on hold time. Nope, really? Oh well, let’s call tomorrow. Looks like I’ll be waiting yet again. Whoa, it’s been 20 minutes yet again and I still haven’t heard a WORD from a real person OR a machine encouraging me to stay on the line. God I hate you people.”

60 minutes of waiting on the phone trying to talk to someone about this. I charge businesses a $65-$85/hour consultation fee. I’m wasting sooo much time just trying to figure out how to give you guys $56…

5- So what do they mean by all of this crap? Unfortunately, I believe they want you to mail them a check for $56 made out to a recipient they never defined, along with a check to pay for your ticket made out to who knows? Along with your check, they want you to mail them a blank envelope with pre-paid postage of 90 cents. They then want you to wait for them to send you their traffic school information, apply for one of the traffic schools they list as qualified, attend the school, get your certificate of completion, and then send it to them. What a headache!

6- Instead of spending 60 minutes on the phone without a solution, standing in a never ending line at the traffic court office, or killing yourself, call this number: 1-800-691-5014 This is the number for trafficschool.com who surprisingly enough ANSWERED THE PHONE immediately, and told me what to do as clearly as possible. According to the girl I spoke to, I should go to my court date, tell the judge I would like to request traffic school, and then pay them that day for whatever they need. So much easier. Also, and note that this is not guarenteed, my cousin(cop) told me that if you get a nice judge, they MAY reduce your ticket because you’ve shown you’d like to take traffic school and are making an effort to correct what you’ve done so terribly wrong (gag me). I’m not going to hold my breath for that, but would LOVE to have my ticket reduced. Thanks for reading guys!

Visit: http://www.trafficschool.com for good, readable information.